How Addiction Saved My Life

 

820794706_orig

 

 

 

I know I haven’t posted much lately since I’m actually working on the book, but I was honored to receive a request to write a guest post for Liberty in Christ Ministries if you’d like to check it out. Be sure to read Patty’s story too while you’re there…it’s a good one!

signature1

Not All is Lost! {Guest Post on Marriage and Addiction}

oct20rx

Today I have a guest post on dealing with addiction in the marriage relationship from Saint Jude Retreats. Hope you enjoy!

Not all is lost!

By Annie Kochneva (Saint Jude Retreats)

When thinking about marriage, more often than not, people would first recall the beginning stages of how their family came to be. The proposal, the excitement, the wedding preparation, the vows, the respect and appreciation, the general care for the other person, their feelings and their well-being, the pure love that started it all.  Everyone and anyone would like to think at that beginning stage that people, feelings and things stay the same and they can live in that frozen moment in time, when everything was well… just perfect.wedding

In reality, people, feelings and things change. Sometimes these changes are for the better- people build loving relationships, stronger marriages, unbreakable bonds, mutual respect and understanding.

Sometimes, things don’t work out quite that way. It is an uncomfortable topic for many to discuss, but it is vital to share it with as many people as possible, because realizing that we are not alone sometimes might make the difference between “to repair” or “ to break” a marriage. There are so many factors in a marriage that can affect it in a way to make it more challenging for the people who are trying to make it work; however, substance use, whether it is alcohol or drug or both, is one of the top reasons for divorce in our society.

The reason behind this is perhaps because it is one of the few reasons that affect not only the couple, but the whole family- children and relatives included. It is completely understandable that the stronger the feelings between the spouses prior the substance use, the bigger impact can such an external factor have on their relationship. When that is the case, it is that much harder, because the bigger the expectations are- the bigger the disappointment is at the end. To make things even worse, usually the extended family and friends not only do not support, but sometimes even discourage the spouse, who is not involved in substance use, to continue the relationship and rebuild the marriage. And the loss of support in such a moment can be crucial for some couples, making it a tipping point in the direction of a divorce.shadow couple

Therefore, it is vital for spouses to understand that there are alternatives and there are support channels to help rebuilding relationships that have been affected by substance use, but most of all, that there is hope. Many couples manage not only to rebuild their marriages but to actually make them stronger. No matter which side of the equation you are on- the substance user or the spouse, you can actively participate in the process of saving your marriage, instead of silently observing its ruin. How can you do this?

–        Talk the talk

 In order to rebuild, you have to open up to each other first and that is valid for both sides. Let the other person know how you feel, share your fears and expectations and rebuild your trust.

–        Own up to it

To be able to move on, you first have to admit to your choices, decisions and actions that affected your marriage or your partner in a negative way. Then, you have to accept the consequences that come with them. That applies for both partners.

–        Seek support

Some couples manage to rebuild their lives together and avoid divorce on their own, so it is not impossible. However, there are many alcohol programs that can actively support you in that process and it will be that much easier to let them guide you through that process, there is no need to rediscover the wheel.

–        Put in the work-

After you talk the talk, this is the stage where you have to walk the walk. Nobody can do it for you, but many have done it before you.

And remember, nobody else can do it for you, but you can do it.

{Annie Kochneva is with St. Jude Retreats~ a non-12 step alternative program to conventional alcohol and drug rehab.}

SIGNATUREFORBLOG

 

 

 

 

 

Can You Ever Feel Normal After Narcotic Addiction?

crossRXfinalCome visit me over at Addiction Blog today.

Can you really ever feel normal after narcotic addiction?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SIGNATUREFORBLOG

 

 

 

 

 

The War on Drugs

OUTDORCASKET copy

So much for Simple Saturdays, life has been anything but simple this week.

  • One of my closest friends learned that her mom committed suicide (pills) on the same day she learned she’s having a baby boy.
  • My short and oh-so-sassy 18-year-old daughter had her heart broken yesterday after attending a funeral for a boy her age who died of an accidental overdose.

Pills…pills…pills…are taking over our families! How have we come to this?  I remember seeing a video about the communist manifesto that discussed the best way to destroy America. From the inside-out. Look at the change in our values and laws over the last 50 years. Look at the infiltration of pornography on television and the internet. The availability of alcohol. The availability of drugs…prescriptions and the illegal ones. I can tell you if I know where to get marijuana, everyone does.

I didn’t know the boy who died of an overdose, but I don’t need to. All I need to know is that he was a son, brother, grandson, great-grandson, nephew, and friend. I pray that he also carried Jesus in his heart and is with him in Heaven right now. The alternative, though very real, is not one I like to think of.

Prescriptions drug overdoses are claiming more lives every day. People—often teenagers—taking them for recreational use have no idea what they can do to you. While their brain thinks it can handle the “high” dose, their lungs and heart cannot. In an instant, their life is over.

Parents are burying their children.

Friends are burying friends.

Brothers are burying brothers.

People who are addicted to prescription drugs as a result of medical reasons end up needing more and more to relieve their pain, withdrawals, or whatever the case may be. Again, their brain think the dose can is needed, but their  heart ceases to beat and their lungs cease to inhale.

Anyone abusing prescription pain medications—no matter what the reason—is fighting a battle in their mind. The classic battle between good and evil, Jesus and Satan. The battle being fought is both physical and spiritual To overcome addiction, I can tell you from experience physical assistance is just not enough. A divine intervention is needed.

A young girl, Ashley, who lost her battle to drugs wrote a poem describing life on drugs is like…the horror actually being offered to us when presented with the decision to use drugs. I took her poem, and added a “rebuttal,” if you will, to show the life than Jesus offers everyone. We must only accept.

Here’s the poem. Please read it slowly and share with anyone whom it might help. If you’d like to have a copy, you can upload a PDF version and print for free by clicking HERE.

warondrugspage1

warondrugspage2warondrugspage3warondrugspage4SIGNATUREFORBLOG

Christianity and Addiction~Guest Post at Addiction Blog

 

 

Spiritual_Warfare

I’m excited to be over at addiction blog today with an article and powerful poem on the spiritual warfare of addiction. Please visit me over there today and feel free to leave a comment! I’ll be posting the poem here on my blog in a few weeks. Please share it with anyone you know who might be battling with the hopelessness of addiction.

SIGNATUREFORBLOG

Biblical help with drug addiction~Guest Post at addictionblog.org

Drug addiction…pure joy? Hardly.

Drug addiction often seems impossible to overcome. It cannot be done alone, yet it’s deemed so shameful it’s difficult to share with anyone to get help. So many people attempt to overcome it alone, which Satan just loves. Because the brain is affected so specifically in drug addiction, going it alone just gives Satan a welcome invitation to set up residence in your brain. He will justify all of the wrong decisions you make. Loneliness is one of Satan’s most powerful tools.

God, however, can take WHATEVER addiction you are dealing with and use it for his glory. Instead of pleading and whining to God, specifically ask him what his purpose is for you life. Genuinely seek his plan. He will gladly share that plan with you when you ask in humbleness and complete faith.

If you want to know what God wants you to do, ask him and he will gladly tell you, for he is always ready to give a bountiful supply of wisdom to all who ask him; he will not resent it. (James 1:5 TLB)

If you want to read more about getting help with drug addiction, read my article today at addiction blog. Please share with anyone you suspect may be struggling with prescription drug addiction.


Serving a Supernatural God in an Ordinary World—Is He Your Superhero?

 

For seven years I sought the help of medical doctors, psychologists, chiropractors, and other natural healers to cure me of grand-mal seizures, migraine headaches, depression, and opiate addiction. I hate the think about the thousands upon thousands of dollars I spent doing so.

All that time, I had a direct line to a Superhero. I kept relying on worldly resources when I really needed the Great Physician. The creator of the universe. The ultimate healer. The one who holds the answers to every question. The one who holds the master plan.

As is human nature, I looked for answers myself. I failed. As a Christian, I had direct access to the supernatural. Being born again give you access to the spiritual world. I mean think about it. “Born Again.” You certainly can’t be stuffed back into your mother’s uterus!

 Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.” (John 3:3 NLT)

Born again = Born from above.

I just had to get past myself to realize it. Which apparently took seven years, because apparently I’m fairly stubborn. Once I finally stopped looking inward, and began looking upward, asking God his plan, he healed me overnight. Exactly two years ago today.

On September 25, 2010, I woke up completely free.

Seizures? Gone.

Headaches? Gone.

Depression? Gone.

Addiction? Gone.

He reached his arm down into this ordinary world, and lifted me up to a supernatural place. Other than a few minor headaches, I can honestly say I’ve been completely free from seizures and all medication.

Happy Birthday to me!

Do you have a problem that is beyond your control? Release it to God. Seek out his plan. He can handle it. He’s THE SUPERHERO.

 

From my heart,

Celeste

Learning Through Change…and Patience


There are some new adventures in the Vaughan household these days. Our vacation of Beachy Goodness was just what we needed before the wave of change took place. 

So here’s a mixed-up post to go with my mixed-up life. Forgive my rambling. It’s the state of my brain right now.  

Miranda just graduated from high school

Even though she will be doing the thirteenth year program her first year and going to Greenville Tech, she and her best friend are moving into the apartment above our garage. I’m already regretting the decision to let her do this. I do love Joelle (her BFF) and I hope it will be a good experience for them, but it’s requiring much reorganizing on my part, and I have a feeling I’m inheriting another child’s laundry for next year. 
The day after we returned from Vacation, we purchased a Brightstar franchise. This is an exciting adventure, and we hope to help meet a serious need in our community. But there is so much to learn. David just returned from a week of training in Chicago just full of information. 

During this summer, I’ve taken a few courses on blogging to improve my little niche in space so you’ll enjoy visiting. For all of you who blog, you know the drill. Blogger or WordPress? Which is better? I do love Blogger, but after what I’ve learned, I think WordPress is going to be a better fit for me. So you may see a new look here very soon. We’ll see how it goes. Oh, and I’m excited (I think) to have my blog critiqued by Laura Barnes on her website “Laura B Writer”. Bring on the criticism. I can take it {note to me—reread the prescription verse above}. 
As if that’s not enough to do, I have the privilege of writing a series of twelve articles for Addiction Blog
I’m really excited about this because this is a predominantly educational blog, and they are allowing me to write from a spiritual perspective. I know without a doubt that I would still be in the exact same miserable pit I was in if God had not wrapped me in a blanket of mercy and lifted me to safety. Because of this added writing, I’ll be posting less often on my blog, but don’t worry; I’ll post a link so you can find me wherever I go! 

Last, but not least, I’m still working on THE BOOK. Can you feel the frustration in my fingertips?                       

{This is a great image of what it’s like when I sit to write—something or someone else getting in the way.}
                              
And every time I think my writing is good enough, I learn something new, and feel the need to continue to make it better. Will that feeling ever go away? Probably not. Eventually I’ll have to kick it out of the nest and see if it flies. 


I celebrated (I use that term loosely) my 43rd birthday this week. BTW, I love Facebook birthdays. Who know I would get so excited about so many little notifications! It only takes a second to wish someone a happy birthday on FB, and who knows what joy you may bring someone? All of my birthday wishes made me smile. Okay—getting back on track…

It’s been almost two years since God pulled me out of my pit, healed me, and plopped me here with a purpose. It is my heart’s desire to help others with addiction and depression. I’ve been there and it’s hell—as literally as I can imagine. I’ve been careful not to be too hasty in putting myself out there, as I want to be equipped with the knowledge to counsel with wisdom. I’ve prayerfully and carefully worked with three people with addiction, and one with depression. With each one, God confirms his call on my life. I know I didn’t suffer in vain. Every person I’ve talked to that suffers with addiction issues says the same thing: 

“It’s not terribly helpful to have a professional tell you what you need to do to get better. They can’t understand. Hearing it from someone who has been there personally, understands how you feel, and knows the medical details of addiction makes all the difference in the world.” 

I’ll keep learning, God, and you take me where I need to go. 

 From my heart,
Celeste

Addiction may be stalking closer than you think…


I wanted to share this poem again today. This poem has been a very popular blog post for me, and I didn’t know who wrote it until today. From what I’ve found, a 21-year old woman wrote it by the name of Ashley Van Davis who lost her life to crystal meth. It was found in the top drawer of her dresser after she died.

She may have written it about crystal meth, but it applies to any addictive substance. Once your brain is altered toward addiction in any way, the addiction takes over.

God created our brains to handle whatever comes our way. It’s so complex only our almighty God could have only created it! Here’s a diagram that shows the parts of the brain most closely related to handling our feelings, emotions…portions of our brain that processes everything that happens to us. To see a description of each part of the brain click here. Even if you don’t understand any of the medical language, it’s worth a glance just to be awed by God’s creation. 



Anytime we put anything in our body that affects the way our brain works, God’s perfect system is altered. Unfortunately, in our society today with preservatives in food, prescription drugs, and all the chemicals in our beauty products, our bodies are struggling to process chemicals all the time. We are fighting an uphill battle as it is, so anything we put in our body that affects our brain causes the system to be off kilter. And if any of those substances are addictive, Satan gets a powerful strongholdthat’s hard to beat—a stronghold that is illustrated so well by Ashley’s poem: 

PILLS
I can destroy homes and tear families apart,
Take away your children, and that’s just the start.
I’m more costly than diamonds, more costly than gold;
The sorrow I bring is a sight to behold.

If you need me, remember, I’m easily found.
I live all around you, in schools and in town.
I live with the rich and I live with the poor.
I live down the street, and maybe next door.

My power is awesome. Try me, you’ll see.
But if you do, you may never break free.
Just try me once and I might let you go.
But try me twice, and I’ll own your soul.

When I possess you, you’ll steal and you’ll lie.
You do what you have to just to get high.
The crimes you’ll commit, for my narcotic charms
Will be worth the pleasure you’ll feel in your arms.

You’ll lie to your mother; you’ll steal from your dad
When you see their tears, you should feel sad.
But you’ll forget your morals and how you were raised,
I’ll be your conscience, I’ll teach you my ways.

I take kids from parents, and parents from kids,
I turn people from God, and isolate them from friends.
I’ll take everything from you, your looks and your pride,
I’ll be with you always, right by your side.

You’ll give up your family, your friends and your home,
You’ll lose all your money, and you’ll be alone.
I’ll take and take, till you have nothing to give.
When I’m finished with you you’ll be lucky to live.

If you try me be warned, this is no game.
If given the chance, I’ll drive you insane.
I’ll ravish your body; I’ll control your mind.
I’ll own you completely; your soul will be mine.

Nightmares I’ll give you while lying in bed.
Voices you’ll hear from inside your head.
The sweats, the shakes, and the visions you’ll see,
I want you to know, they’re all gifts from me.

When it’s too late, you’ll know in your heart,
You are all mine, and we shall not part.
You’ll regret that you tried me; they always do;
But you came to me, not I to you.

You knew this would happen. Many times you were told,
But you challenged my power, and chose to be bold.
You could have said no, and just walked away,
If you could live that day over, now what would you say?

I’ll be your master; you’ll be my slave,
I’ll even go with you, when you go to your grave.
Now that you’ve met me, what will you do?
Will you try me or not? It’s all up to you.
I can bring you more misery than words can tell.
Come take my hand, let me lead you to hell…

Ashley lost her life to addiction. She wrote this poem from her heart. Share this anywhere you can to make others aware of what addiction can do. Addiction is happening all around us, but it’s not a subject that likes to be exposed. Social stigma, fear, and rejection are all reasons people hide addiction. For many, once addiction has hold of it’s prey, it’s impossible to break free. The best way to fight addiction is to educate people and arm them with the tools they need to never be trapped by an addiction in the first place. 

Don’t let it happen to you, your best friend, your neighbor, your daughter, or your son…because chances are it’s stalking closer than you think. 
From my heart, 
Celeste



Tips to a Happier You in 2012~Made to Crave



Here are a few things I know about taste and mood: 

  • It makes us happy to eat something sweet…a comfort food.
  • If we eat a healthy diet, we feel better and are therefore happier.
  • A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. 
  • We feel happier—more satisfied—when our stomachs are full. 
And last but not least…
  • Food is often about relationships. Relationships between us and God, us and friends, and us and our own soul.
There have been tons of studies done testing what we eat with how we feel. We all know that certain vitamins—like Omega-3 fatty acids for instance—feed our brains and increases our overall well-being. 

Food is obviously an important topic to God, as the Bible is full of references to food. Many major events in the Bible took place around food. 

But the food—and the choice of food— was used as a gateway to Christ. Whether it was sacrifice, celebration, or miracle, the food was all about Christ. His body is the bread.

I’ll be honest. This is a tough topic for me. In research, depending on the exact point you search for, there are arguments in every direction. For more information about the arguing voices in my head, check out my post Acceptance in Christ—which honestly is not the best title considering it deals mostly with food. But oh well. 

One of the books I’ve read this year is Made to Crave, which is honestly the most unusual—but also the most enlightening—book about diets. Mostly because it is and is not a diet book. I’m afraid you will just have to read to see what I mean. But there’s one thing I learned (well, confirmed my thought anyway):

We crave whatever is a part of our life—what we do, who we see, what we eat, what we drink, etc. 

    • If we watch pornography, we want to watch more.
    • If we drink alcohol—or Mountain Dew—we want to drink more.
    • If we use drugs, we want them more (And I’m a witness to that one!) 

The neat thing is, though, that the flip side of this is true as well.

    • If we read about God, we want to know more.
    • If we become a volunteer, we want to volunteer more.
    • If we begin tithing, we want to tithe more. 
I’ll share a secret here. I almost didn’t write a blog post today. Not because I didn’t want to, it’s just that time got away from me this week and I found myself beginning this post at midnight last night. Only to hear David say, “What the heck are you doing on your computer NOW?” He really gets tired of seeing me on my computer. 

Well, he hurt my feelings. And as all great women do, I pouted. Most of the day today. Didn’t get anything accomplished. You know the video that surface a few months ago about the father putting a bullet in his daughter’s laptop? I think that’s what David would like to do to mine sometimes. 

But I realized something really important about myself today. I was made to write. It is one of God’s purposes for me. You may get this post a day late, and it may mean only a little to a very few people. But God compels me to write, so it must be for something! I just have to find more time alone. Hmmm….

Okay, back to topic. 

Our taste buds can deceive us. What we think makes us happy, may be only temporary. Since I’ve cut back on sugar, I don’t crave it nearly like I used to. And since I’ve been blogging and writing for God, I crave it more and more. As Lysa Terkeurst says, “We were made to crave.” 



We just have to begin putting away the bad, and starting on the good. 

“Whether we’re on the path toward victory or defeat is determined by the very next choice we make. Not the choices from yesterday. Not the choices five minutes ago.” ~Lysa Terkeurst

We must retrain our taste buds—whether it’s the ones in our mouth or those on our heart—to crave good. 

Especially to crave God.
From my heart,
Celeste

P.S. If you want to know more about the foods and vitamins that can physically enhance your mood, click here for the link to my Delicious stack, Diet for Depression.

Make-a-change Monday~Freedom to Fly



I’ve written a few blog posts recently about freedom. With Memorial Day just behind us and July 4th ahead, we see much in the news about the freedom of our country. I’m thankful every day for the soldiers who fight for our country’s freedom. But for each of us personally, what good is the freedom of our country if we aren’t free within ourselves? 

Freedom is a big word. 


Personal freedom is like a hot air balloon. There are so many factors that affect whether or not it will be able to fly…. or be free. 


Some factors cannot be controlled. Wind and precipitation for instance. Then there are other factors which can be controlled, and are actually used by the balloonist to keep the balloon from flying—tethers and sandbags.  


Satan uses as many circumstances as he can to keep us from freedom. We many not be able to control the state of the economy, war among nations, poverty, or natural disasters, but we can control the sandbags and tethers in our lives. 


Let me rephrase…with Christ, we can control the sandbags and tethers in our lives. 




What are our sandbags and tethers?

  • Addiction—To television, pills, work, sex, pornography, food, etc.
  • Animosity—Holding a grudge against someone
  • Greed—Constantly feeling the need to hold on to your possessions
  • Worry—About the future, the economy, your children, poverty, war, etc.
  • Abuse—Verbally or physically by someone close to you
  • Pride—Defining success by your own understanding and accomplishments
These are all burdens we bear unnecessarily. Just as the balloonist might feel safer and more in control with a few sandbags in the basket, we get comfortable with things in our life that keep us from true freedom. 

I held tightly to my sandbags for seven years…some of them most of my life. Pride, addiction, and worry were the tools that Satan used to keep me from freedom. 

You know that verse in the Bible that says everything is permissible but not everything is beneficial? Read this translation from The Message:

Just because something is technically legal doesn’t mean
that it’s spiritually appropriate. If I went around doing whatever
I thought I could get away with, I’d be a slave to my whims. 
(1 Corinthians 6:12 MSG)

There is no freedom without boundaries. God gives us some boundaries in scripture. Some are created simply by the law of our land. Most boundaries, however, are left up to us. 

When I was battling addiction and depression, I was a complete prisoner to my medication. Whenever we would plan to go out of town, I panicked when I thought there was a possibility I could run out. One year we planned a family vacation to Park City, Utah to go skiing, and all I could think about was, “What if I run out of medication?” Sad.

I was a prisoner. 

My {make-a-change} Monday challenge today is to identify the things in your life that keep you from complete freedom. What are your sandbags? Pick one, and see how you can change it this week. It may be as simple as keeping the television off for a week; it may be as hard as seeking help to get out of an abusive situation. It may just be looking inside your heart and finding forgiveness for someone who has hurt you. 

I promise God can handle whatever sandbag you’re trying to throw out of the basket. He has it under control. We can fight for control, knowing we will eventually lose, or we can let him have it and begin to live a life of freedom in Christ. 
Be still, and know that I am God. 
(Psalm 46:10 ESV)



Throw off those sandbags and fly! 

From my heart, 
Celeste

The Secret to a fulfilled life with purpose



I had an article published at “Inspire A Fire” this week on the addiction part of my story. If you’ve read my story page on here you know my story is full of gut wrenching moments, but the addiction part seems to gain much attention; maybe because I’m a pharmacist, maybe because I’m a Christian, or maybe just because it’s the juiciest part of the story. It makes no difference to me, as long as someone is brought closer to Christ through it. 
One of the most important statements I wrote in that article is one that has received several comments: 
Only when my desire to know His plan for my life became greater than my desire to fix myself, He healed me.”
That statement is what I want to focus on today. 
I whole-heartedly believe that this is the secret to a fulfilled life with purpose that has been kept far too secret. I mean, you wouldn’t think it’s a secret because the scripture tells us right there in Matthew 6: 
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness,
 and all these things will be added to you.
Now I was raised in the church, memorizing scripture along the way, but I’m not sure this verse ever really sunk in. I’d read this verse, but for some reason the verse that I heard in my head was Luke 11:9-10: 
And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.
Ask and it will be given to you.
Who can’t get on board with that? Just ask. 
But both of these scriptures, Matthew 6 and Luke 11, are instructing us in how to pray. In Luke 11, we are told to be persistent in our prayers. Ask, ask, ask. But we are also told to seek. Seek what? 
Back to Matthew’s instruction on prayer: Seek ye first the kingdom of God
Maybe this is why we have four Gospels—four accounts of the life of Jesus on earth. God gave them to us to read them all, not just one. But I digress…
When I was fighting seizures, migraines, depression, insomnia, and addiction during my seven years of hell, you better believe I asked. I asked for God to take the seizures, migraines, depression, insomnia and addiction away. I asked to be happy again. When He was silent, I asked for the rapture. I either wanted to be healed, or be gone. I asked and asked and asked. 
But I did not seek first. 
I know God has a plan. I’ve always known he has a big, all-encompassing, life-long plan. But I never once asked him to show me what it was. I never really had the desire to know my part in His plan
When I had my last seizure, on August 4, 2010, I was at rock bottom. Any resilience I might have had was gone. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I didn’t have the energy to even get dressed. I loved my family, but I had resigned to the fact that I was no good for them. Marlee, my 8-year-old, was baptized on August 8, 2010, and it took every bit of strength I had to make it to her baptism. I envisioned spending the rest of my life in some type of extended care facility. It was really that bad. 
I knew this wasn’t God’s plan for my life. 
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
(Jeremiah 29:11 NIV) 
For the first time ever, it was my heart’s desire to know his plan and purpose for me. It was beyond my thoughts, down deep to the core. What my brain thought was overridden by my deepest desires.What I wanted didn’t really matter any more. I didn’t care enough about my life for Him to fix me. I had gotten to the end of myself, and the beginning of Him. 
On September 25, 2010, just over seven weeks after that last seizure, He healed me. Just like that. I woke up that Saturday morning and I was an entirely new person. My mind was clear, I had energy, I felt happy, I wanted to eat, I hugged my kids and called my husband (he was out of town), I called my family and friends, and I knew without a doubt that God had given me a miracle. 
Within three months, I was completely off all medications. It has now been almost eighteen months since I’ve been medication free, and I can honestly say I’ve had no cravings for any narcotics (which I never thought I’d be able to say), I’ve had no seizures or symptoms of seizures, I’m happier than I’ve ever been, and I sleep like a baby. 
I never want to forget how bad I was, because I never want to forget the incredible strength and mercy of my Savior.
He saved me that day.
He saved me because I was finally ready.
I was finally seeking Him first, above everything. 
From my heart,
Celeste

 

Falling into the trap of addiction





If you follow my blog, you know I haven’t been posting as much recently. I’m getting serious about my book, which I’ve been devoting more time to, so today I’m giving you an excerpt. If there were one part of my story I could forget, the narcotic addiction would be it. It took me a long time to include this in my book, but God has called me to be transparent. I love the verse I chose for today’s prescription. I’m taking the shame of my past, which is erased in God’s eyes, and using it to share his truths.
The world we live in revolves around pills. Whether addiction occurs from taking pain medication from an injury or from sheer curiosity, the addiction potential is the same. Drugs do not care who you are, what you do, where you live, how much money you make, or whether or not you’re a Christian. Too many people are blissfully unaware how narcotics work and how dangerous they can be. It seems ridiculous to me that I let myself become addicted because I’m a pharmacist. But I wouldn’t trade anything for the understanding I have now. Addiction is truly a phenomenon you cannot understand until you’ve been there. I certainly would have never imagined it could happen to me. 
I hope you enjoy this tidbit of my story. 
My first seizure, though unnerving, did not leave me with any physical harm done to my body. I wasn’t so fortunate this second time around. In the emergency room, I was told I had a broken nose. My first glance in the mirror confirmed it. My head was killing me and my body hurt all over. When I fell this time, I was standing in the middle of the pharmacy, and I went down sideways into the “P” section of the pharmacy shelves. Apparently I wiped out the Premarin, Provera, and Prozac sections to say the least. My head hit first, and my nose caught one of the shelves at just the right angle to make it good and whop-sided. With my head as the lead Lego, knocking down the lower shelves, my body followed crashing to the hard, tile floor. I’m thankful my brain didn’t remember the scene, but my body sure did. I have to be honest here. I’m a wimp. I don’t like pain, I’ve never liked pain, and I do not tolerate it well. The emergency room doctor sent me home with prescriptions for Depakote (for seizures) and Lortab (for pain), a list of  “do’s and don’ts” for seizure patients, and a referral to an ear, nose and throat surgeon for my crooked nose. And so my recovery began.
The soreness slowly dissipated from my muscles, and the bruises on my body faded away. The bruises on my soul, however, were growing. The ear, nose, and throat specialist informed me that sinus surgery was in my near future if I wanted to ever use my nose for breathing again. Breathing through my nose. Hmmmm. Sounds rather necessary. Sinus surgery it was.
In pharmacy school, I was able to sit through four surgical procedures during my clinical rotations. One of those surgeries just so happened to be a rhinoplasty—a nose job. It wasn’t long into that surgery that I completely understood why people are so black and blue after a nose reconstruction. You’d have thought the surgeons were working with Play-doh or clay, not an actual human face. I was mortified to watch as the doctor cut inside the nostrils with a scalpel, and with his equivalent of tweezers, pulled cartilage out. Then they proceeded to mash, tug, squeeze, push, and squish this man’s nose until they had molded it into the shape they wanted. I wasn’t getting a nose job per say, but the surgery is essentially the same to fix a broken, crooked nose.
Between the emergency room and visits to my neurologist, and visits and surgeon, it took about two months for me to come to the end of this nasal nightmare. Lortab, a narcotic pain medication, had become my friend to get through those months, especially during my recovery from the surgery. It was not pleasant to have my sinuses packed with gauze attached to small tongue depressors hanging out of my nose for a week. Remember what a great pain tolerance I have? When the packing was finally pulled from my nostrils, which felt like ropes being pulled from my brain, my nasal nightmare was over. Or so I thought. For the most part, my pain was gone, so I stopped taking the Lortab. I could have never guessed what was coming next. 
Watch for my next post to get a unique perspective on drug addiction. Understand the truth about the dangers of addiction so you can prevent those you love from falling into the trap. Addiction is very hard to overcome. In some cases, prevention is the only cure. 
SIGNATUREFORBLOG





Smart Parenting: Don’t wait til it’s too late!

Parenting. Whew! It’s a hard job these days! As if it’s not hard enough worrying about helping them with the basics like homework, friends, and dating, now we have to worry about the drugs that are rampant in our society today. Many people don’t realize how dangerous drugs are. These drugs are deadly–Crack, cocaine, Oxycontin, heroin, and now bath salts! Some of these drugs are addictive the very first time they are used, and then it may be too late. The very best method is prevention. But what if that doesn’t work? 
Will you know the signs? 
Will you admit that your child may be using drugs you or will you be in denial, hoping it will go away? 
Will you confront them?
Will you be too embarrassed to get them the help they need? 
Will you become an enabler because you’re afraid they will come to hate you?
Satan uses drugs to get a stronghold on our youth of today. Anita Estes has a new book available, Letters to God on a Prodigal Son:Overcoming Addiction Through Prayer in which she shares the story of her son’s drug addiction, the signs that she recognized, and her prayers to help him overcome it. 
If you have a child, whether you suspect drug use or not, you need to read this book. I know too many parents who realize what’s going on too late. Just as we try to arm our children for the world we live in, we need to arm ourselves with the tools we need to parent them. This book is an essential tool. If you purchase it on November 8th, you can even get some free gifts! Here’s the link…
Be armed and ready! 
From my heart,

Celeste